THAT OUGHT TO DO IT. Well, it's over. It's all over but the shouting, as my mom used to say. Madonna has called for world peace. Who could resist? I mean, when an Italian singer from New York who lives in England and practices Kabbala visits Israel and calls for world peace while wearing her red string around her wrist to ward off the evil eye, how could anyone go on fighting? Reports are coming in from all over. The Serbs and Croats and Bosnians will no longer fight. Arab terrorists all over the world have laid down their arms. Osama has surrendered. The French surrendered. Again. The Indians and Pakistanis have embraced. The Nigerians have agreed to let Christians live and prosper. The Sudanese government has quit terrorizing its own people. The Hutus and the Tutsis are drinking from the same cup. The Lion lies down with the Lamb.

The U.N. ended its session today by singing "We Are The World" and Kofi took credit for the worldwide peace. Jimmy Carter said he knew it could happen once America admitted its guilt for the problems of the world. He even came back to the Southern Baptist Church.

What did the Beatles' song say? "Somebody spoke and I went in to a dream."

Madonna. Sheesh.