ONE MORE THING BENNY HINN CAN'T HEAL: HIS MARRIAGE

Suzanne "holy ghost enema" Hinn filed for divorce in Orange County Superior Court on Feb. 1st. She claimed irreconcilable differences. Benny and Suzanne have been married for more than 30 years.

It will be interesting to see if details come out about Benny's financial empire.

A LITTLE HUMOR FOR TODAY

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.'

The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. '

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.'

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?'

The wife smiles demurely and says, 'You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.'

As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, 'Damit, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?'

The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine.'

The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took
it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.'

The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving.'

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??'

The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?'

'Only when he's been drinking.

When I invited Jesus into my life, I thought he was going to put up some wallpaper and hang a few pictures. But he started knocking out walls and adding on rooms. I said "I was expecting a nice cottage." but he said, "I'm making a palace in which to live." C. S. Lewis.

OH THOSE YOUNGS

It is not every day that a well known father and son make the news at the same time. And, as is typical in Southern Baptist life, it is not a good thing. Ed Young Sr. is in the blogging news for his sermon on America's tax system. Now, why in the world you would devote pulpit time to the tax system is beyond me. If he heard someone taking pulit time to promote Obama, he would be furious. They only thing he should say about the tax system is "render unto Caesar".

But, he may have been hoping to reform the tax system for the benefit of his son, Ed Young Jr. Junior carries on dad's legacy of pastoring really large churches. Junior is in the news, the MSM type of news, for his lavish lifestyle of big houses and fancy cars.

Men love to build empires, don't they. Some do it in churches.

It is snowing really hard right now. Great big flakes are falling almost straight down. Is this what manna looked like?

It is amazing how fast the flakes fall. It is as if they are racing each other to the ground. I get the tree! I get the car. Oh, I want in Larry's Starbucks cup. Ouch, not a good idea.

We will even up with at least 6 inches of snow or even more at this rate. This is an amazing event for Fort Worth, Texas.

Now THAT'S what I call a study. I'd never come out if I had it.

The Washington Post says D.C. is having the worst winter in recorded local history. So, my question is this. Is the worst winter ever caused by global warming or global cooling? Al? Anybody?

HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?
As sung by President Obama

In the midst of the controversy over President Obama’s negative comments about Las Vegas comes more bad news for Sin City.

The Ritz-Carlton Las Vegas Hotel will close in May. It is a 348 room, five-diamond property. It is only seven years old. The owners cite decreased demand and revenue.

The current owner is actually Village Hospitality, a subsidiary of Deutsche Bank's German American Capital Corporation. It bought the hotel in a foreclosure sale in February 2009. Ritz-Carlton, the original owner, is a division of Marriott International .

One of the effects of the closing will be the loss of 350 jobs, although some may be relocated to other Ritz-Carlton properties. For a city already hit hard, this is bad news.

Some of the slow down in luxury hotel business is called the "AIG effect". It is named after the public’s anger at American International Group’s decision to send their top brokers and executives to a luxury hotel\resort right after AIG was bailed out by the government. You know, hey we are broke, we need help. Thanks for the help, we’re going on an expensive vacation to celebrate. Sucker.

Exacerbating the situation are comments by the President and other politicians about Las Vegas and corporate activities. This is ironic since Harry Reid, from Nevada, has been a staunch supporter of the President’s legislative package.

No good deed goes unpunished.

And, the law of unintended consequences applies. Obama rode to office on the breathless support of exactly the kind of people losing their jobs with the help of his comments.

It seems appropriate that Washington D.C. is getting a major snow job. Now they know how we feel.

READING THE STARTLEGRAM

Our beloved local newspaper certainly has its priorities straight regarding the news. Under "National Briefs", the first two items are about the lives of actors and former actors. The first, and I know you will be relieved to know this, Charlie Sheen and his wife are back together. This breathless news is from the Associated Press, so at least they did not send a reporter up to Colorado (from whence the story is posted) to follow Mr. Sheen and his wife around and report back to us on the status of their marriage.

The second item is that "former child television star" Gary coleman pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor (also related to domestic violence). I mean, this guy is not even on tv any more, but it makes the paper if he goes to court?

The third item is the sentencing of a Chinese born engineer for passing on sensitive information to China. Which of these three seems most important to the nation?

The fourth story is that the Obama administration will spend $78.5 million. This, of course, is not news at all: they do that every day for any possible reason. This might be news worth because of the reason for the expense. I kid you not, the expense is to help keep giant Asian carp out ofh the Great lakes. I thought maybe part of the Chinese engineer's sentence could be to fish for giant Asian carp and take them back to Asia along with the secrets he stole. It seems fair to me.

And maybe Gary Coleman could help, even though the Giant Carp are probably bigger than Gary Coleman. Maybe Charlie Sheen could catch them, Gary Coleman could clean them and pack them, and the Chinese guy could take them back to China.

The picture is not of Charlie Sheen and his wife getting back together, but is Charlie Sheen and Gary Coleman holding a giant carp. The carp is in the middle.

Seriously, this would have many benefits. First, the Obama Administration could pay them with Stimulus Bill money and claim the creation of the first 3 jobs under that program.

Second, the export of the carp could be claimed to even out the import\export ration with China. For every DVD player you sent over, you have to take a carp.

Third, we could send carp to Haiti and claim it as humanitarian relief.

Fourth, we would have to use a lot of ice to keep the carp cool, which would help all those newly embarassed scientists and politicians claim that global warming exists. It must, because there is less ice than before. They just would put the part that it went to Haiti in a foot note or forget to mention it altogether.

Fifth, the could send any remaining carp to Las Vegas, because we know they would not come back. After all, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. The downside is, the President could not claim he was not carping about Las Vegas when Harry Reid calls to complain about the latest Vegas comment in an Obama speech. And, if a surplus of carp occurs in Las Vegas, they could send them to Los Angeles via the high speed train that a good chunk of the Stimulus money went to.

Sixth, carp could be fed to school children. It is lower in fat than chicken fingers, although you cannot tell it from looking at a chicken. Children would loose weight, partly because of the lack of fat, and even more so because they would never in a million years eat something called Giant Carp, so it would be a great diet plan, otherwise known as fasting.

Just as an aside to that fasting idea, I once had someone tell me not to fast because it shut the body's metabolism down and would make you gain weight. I guess, then, that all those really thin people starving in Somalia will eventually gain weight and get fat without our having to feed them.

Whew. Well, that is what you get when you read the Startlegram national briefs: a lot of carp.

THIS IS STRANGE

There are two guys named "Strange" running for Justice of the Supreme Court of Texas, place 3.

Joanna is in Louisiana.

Even Penn Jillette, the magician, doesn't like the President bashing Vegas. Maybe he could make Obama disapear.

The best obituary for a laptop ever.

Parallels of Abraham Lincoln and Barack Obama (I received this by email today):

Lincoln placed his hand on the Bible for his inauguration.
Obama used the same Bible.

Lincoln came from Illinois.
Obama comes from Illinois.

Lincoln served in the Illinois Legislature.
Obama served in the Illinois Legislature.

Lincoln had very little experience before becoming President.
Obama had very little experience before becoming President.

Lincoln rode the train from Philadelphia to Washington for his inauguration.
Obama rode the train from Philadelphia to Washington for his inauguration.

Lincoln was a skinny lawyer.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Lincoln was a Republican.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Lincoln was highly respected.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Lincoln was born in the United States.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Lincoln was honest, so honest he was called Honest Abe.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Lincoln saved the United States.
Obama is a skinny lawyer.

Disclaimer: the foregoing was not checked for accuracy, was presente for purposes of humor and satire only, are not meant to be representations or misrepresentations of truth, are not excluded from contradictory statements made earlier as part of any campaign for office or fund raising opportunity, and do not necessarily represent the views of the management. void where prohitied by law. do not remove this tag.

Thi is a test of blogging from my iPhone. I mean, after all, you can do everything else from your iPhone, right ?

NOTE TO THE PRESIDENT: PLEASE PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH

In a speech in New Hampshire today, the President had this sage advice: “When times are tough, you tighten your belts. You don’t go buying a boat when you can barely pay your mortgage. You don’t blow a bunch of cash in Vegas when you’re trying to save for college.”

The irony is, the day before, he unleashed the biggest spending budget in history. It is the very thing that turned me off the Democratic Party years ago. They want you to suffer while they live it up.

If talking out of both sides of your mouth is an art, this president is our Picasso.

SPENDING FREEZE PART II

"The president has been talking a good game when it comes to government spending, but there is a dramatic disconnect between his rhetoric and his actions. Julst las week he called for a spending freeze, then today he releases a budget containing the largest deficit in U.S. history, that doubles the debt in five years, and triples it by 2019." Joe Barton, U.S. Representative from Arlington.

Is "talking a good game" political speech for lying?

SPENDING FREEZE

How does a "spending freeze" create a deficit of in a one year budget of 1.27 trillion dollars?

NEW STUDY ON ABSTINENCE EDUCATION: IT WORKS

A recently released study on abstinence education has interesting results. The study is: Efficacy of a Theory-Based Abstinence-Only Intervention Over 24 Months
A Randomized Controlled Trial With Young Adolescents by John B. Jemmott III, PhD; Loretta S. Jemmott, PhD, RN; Geoffrey T. Fong, PhD Arch Pediatr Adolesc Med. 2010;164(2):152-159. That is a lot of stuff, is it not? But I wanted to make sure they got the proper credit.

The study defined its objective as follows: To evaluate the efficacy of an abstinence-only intervention in preventing sexual involvement in young adolescents. That is relevant to the religious world, because we are constantly hammered with people claiming it does not work at all and all kids will have premarital sex regardless of the education.

The study was designed as a randomized controlled trial and was conducted in urban public schools. The participants were 662 African American students in 6th and 7th grade.

Interventions An 8-hour abstinence-only intervention targeted reduced sexual intercourse; an 8-hour safer sex–only intervention targeted increased condom use; 8-hour and 12-hour comprehensive interventions targeted sexual intercourse and condom use; and an 8-hour health-promotion control intervention targeted health issues unrelated to sexual behavior. Participants also were randomized to receive or not receive an intervention maintenance program to extend intervention efficacy.

The results showed that "abstinence only" education reduced sexual initiation risk. Fewer abstinence only class participants engaged in sex than in those who did not participate. The class participants also produced fewer reports of having multiple partners compared with the non-attenders.

The researchers stated their conclusion Theory-based abstinence-only interventions may have an important role in preventing adolescent sexual involvement.

Abstaining from sexual activity is difficult in today's world, where one is inundated by sex on television, in movies and in print, not to mention peer pressure. However, if we give up, especially as Christians, we cannot hope to maintain Biblical standards. Here we see that statistics show there is some effect even when the environment is secular rather than church groups. If it works to any extent in a secular setting, it should be even more effective in a church setting.

IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said Iran will deliver a harsh blow to "global arrogance" on February 11.

For the Madman of Iran, this could mean anything from a nuclear attack on Israel to a plan to talk us to death.