Love

Who will you tell that you love on Valentine’s Day? And how will you express that love?

Sadly, I’m convinced that there are too many loveless relationships in the world, and even in the church. For starters, there are many things we call love that just do not rise to the level of what love is. And then to complicate matters, we lack a clear definition of what love does.

So in the midst of all the love hype surrounding Valentine’s Day, I want to give you 24 concrete definitions of love.

These definitions don’t come from Wikipedia, Dictionary.com, or Shakespeare. We get our best standard of love from the Cross of the Lord Jesus Christ. His sacrifice of love is the ultimate example of what love is and what love does.

1. LOVE IS willing self-sacrifice for the good of another that does not require reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving.

2. LOVE IS being willing to have your life complicated by the needs and struggles of others without impatience or anger.

3. LOVE IS actively fighting the temptation to be critical and judgmental toward another while looking for ways to encourage and praise.

4. LOVE IS making a daily commitment to resist the needless moments of conflict that come from pointing out and responding to minor offenses.

5. LOVE IS being lovingly honest and humbly approachable in times of misunderstanding.

6. LOVE IS being more committed to unity and understanding than you are to winning, accusing, or being right.

7. LOVE IS making a daily commitment to admit your sin, weakness, and failure and to resist the temptation to offer an excuse or shift the blame.

8. LOVE IS being willing, when confronted by another, to examine your heart rather than rising to your defense or shifting the focus.

9. LOVE IS making a daily commitment to grow in love so that the love you offer to another is increasingly selfless, mature, and patient.

10. LOVE IS being unwilling to do what is wrong when you have been wronged, but looking for concrete and specific ways to overcome evil with good.

11. LOVE IS being a good student of another, looking for their physical, emotional, and spiritual needs so that in some way you can remove the burden, support them as they carry it, or encourage them along the way.

12. LOVE IS being willing to invest the time necessary to discuss, examine, and understand the relational problems you face, staying on task until the problem is removed or you have agreed upon a strategy of response.

13. LOVE IS being willing to always ask for forgiveness and always being committed to grant forgiveness when it is requested.

14. LOVE IS recognizing the high value of trust in a relationship and being faithful to your promises and true to your word.

15. LOVE IS speaking kindly and gently, even in moments of disagreement, refusing to attack the other person’s character or assault their intelligence.

16. LOVE IS being unwilling to flatter, lie, manipulate, or deceive in any way in order to co-opt the other person into giving you what you want or doing something your way.

17. LOVE IS being unwilling to ask another person to be the source of your identity, meaning, and purpose, or inner sense of well-being, while refusing to be the source of theirs.

18. LOVE IS the willingness to have less free time, less sleep, and a busier schedule in order to be faithful to what God has called you to be and to do as a spouse, parent, neighbor, etc.

19. LOVE IS a commitment to say no to selfish instincts and to do everything that is within your ability to promote real unity, functional understanding, and active love in your relationships.

20. LOVE IS staying faithful to your commitment to treat another with appreciation, respect, and grace, even in moments when the other person doesn’t seem deserving or is unwilling to reciprocate.

21. LOVE IS the willingness to make regular and costly sacrifices for the sake of a relationship without asking for anything in return or using your sacrifices to place the other person in your debt.

22. LOVE IS being unwilling to make any personal decision or choice that would harm a relationship, hurt the other person, or weaken the bond of trust between you.

23. LOVE IS refusing to be self-focused or demanding, but instead looking for specific ways to serve, support, and encourage, even when you are busy or tired.

24. LOVE IS daily admitting to yourself, the other person, and God that you are unable to be driven by a cruciform love without God’s protecting, providing, forgiving, rescuing, and delivering grace.

God Bless,
Paul Tripp

CHRIST OUR MODEL - 1 PETER 3:18-22

Christ Our Model
3:18-22

Peter again shows that Christ is our model. He also suffered. And he suffered for righteousness. He suffered for our sins even though he was righteous, that he could bring us to God. (18) This is substitutionary atonement. Jesus died for our sins.

Jesus’ death was not a defeat, because he was resurrected. We will follow him to the same destiny. Jesus was raised from the grave and ascended to heaven. Heaven is also our destiny after physical death, so we do not need to fear it. The troubles of this life are temporary because Christ has triumphed.

Now for the difficult part. Even Martin Luther said he could not be sure what Peter meant here.

Peter said Christ was put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit. (18) The ESV does not capitalize the word “spirit”, interpreting the verse as meaning Christ’s spirit lived although his body was killed.

The NIV, KJV and CSB say Jesus was made alive by the Spirit, capitalizing the word “Spirit”, meaning the Holy Spirit raised Christ from the dead.

I believe the NIV is correct here. The contrast is between Jesus’ death and his resurrection. It is not about some interim period between death and resurrection. The resurrection is where the victory is. And, Jesus was raised bodily, not just in the spirit. The Holy Spirit was the agent of the Christ’s resurrection.

Jesus’ spirit did not need to made alive. His spirit, like ours, would continue alive after death of the body regardless of the work of the Holy Spirit. It is that Christ’s body that must be “made alive”, just as ours will be made alive at the Resurrection.

This is why it is a hope for us to anticipate. Paul made this same statement in 1 Corinthians 15:45-49 when he contrasted our “natural” bodied with our “spiritual” bodies. Natural bodies are the bodies we live in now. Spiritual bodies are those we have after the Resurrection.

We may be persecuted, tortured, or even killed in the body. But we will be raised with a new, glorified body for eternity, as Jesus was.

There is a similar thought in 1 Timothy 3:16. It says Jesus was “manifested in the flesh”. He took on human flesh at his incarnation, his birth as a human being. And, he was vindicated by the Spirit (and the ESV capitalizes here). How was he vindicated? He was resurrected (“taken up to glory”).

Peter then says that Christ, in the Holy Spirit, went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison. (19) They were in prison because they did not obey in the days before the flood. So, the question is, who are these spirits in prison? There are several views.

Here is the one I think is best. The spirits in prison are fallen angels. The word “spirits” in the New Testament refers to angelic beings in almost all cases. (Matthew 8:16; Luke 10:20; Acts 19:12; Hebrews 1:14)

The “time of Noah” seems to refer another difficult passage, Genesis 6:1-4, which describes corrupt behavior of the sons of God with the daughters of men. The Hebrew word translated “Nephilim” literally means “fallen ones”. This interpretation of Genesis 6 was the standard interpretation in Peter’s day.

We see a similar thought in Jude 6, which refers to angels who did not stay within their own position of authority, but left their proper dwelling. These angels God kept in eternal chains (bound) in gloomy darkness (prison) until the the day of judgment. Jude also compared them to the residents of Sodom who “likewise” indulged in sexual immorality. And, finally, Revelation 20:7 speaks of Satan being released from his prison after the thousand years are ended. The word “prison” is never used as a place where human beings reside after death.

Peter himself used this terminology in 2 Peter 2:4 when he wrote “For if God did not spare angels when they sinned, but cast them into hell and committed them to chains of gloomy darkness to be kept until the judgment…”

So, the resurrected Christ proclaimed his victory over Satan and his fallen angels. We see this proclamation of victory in verse 22, which says Jesus Christ is the one who has gone into heaven and is at the right hand of God, with angels, authorities, and powers having been subjected to him.

Knowing Christ’s victory over persecution and death gives us the strength and hope to face persecution. 

My Prayer For You

I pray that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.

May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.

Colossians 1:9-12

RIGHTEOUS SUFFERING - 1 PETER 3:13-20

Righteous Suffering
3:13-17

Peter now turns to the subject of suffering. Generally speaking, the government, or other people, do not seek to harm you for doing what is good. It does happen, however, when people or governments are opposed to Christ and Christians. Still, although persecution may cause you physical or emotional pain, the persecutors cannot take away your salvation or your relationship to God. As verse 12 said, quoting a Psalm, the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are open to their prayers. He sees us and hears us and is with us.

If we do suffer for the sake of righteousness, we will be blessed. We will have the favor of the Lord and reward in heaven. We must remember that suffering is not the opposite of blessing, as the prosperity gospel would have us believe. Jesus said “blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” (Matthew 5:11-12)

Paul and Silas demonstrated this rejoicing when, being attacked and beaten and thrown in the Phillipian jail, they stayed up until midnight praying and singing hymns to God while their feet were bound in stocks. (Acts 16:16-25)

Suffering has generally been the lot of Christianity. Indeed, Jesus told his disciples to expect it. He said “In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) And the disciples did suffer persecution. In Acts, we saw Peter and John brought before the Sanhedrin and jailed. We know that Peter was eventually martyred and John exiled.

Again we see Peter taking the long view, looking at what we are able to do on earth because of who we are in Christ and what we have in eternity. Therefore, we should not fear the persecutors or be troubled by them. (13)

Instead of fearing the persecutors, we are to honor Christ as holy. (15) We exchange fear of men for fear of the Lord. And who knew that exchange better than Peter? Peter, in the courtyard outside the house of the high priest, denied Christ to a lowly servant girl. But, after Pentecost, he refused to back down to the Sanhedrin, the very same group that put Jesus to trial in the house of the high priest, and proclaimed he must obey God and not men. (Acts 5:29) Peter had exchanged his fear of men with the fear of the Lord, honoring Christ as Lord in his heart.

In giving this instruction, Peter was reflecting the word of the Lord in Isaiah 8:12. The Lord spoke to Isaiah and told him “do not fear what they fear, nor be in dread. But the Lord of hosts, him you shall honor as holy. Let him be your fear, and let him be your dread.”

As a side note, Peter made a statement of the divinity of Jesus here, equating him with the Lord of hosts in the Old Testament.)

Jesus had also instructed Peter and the other disciples not be afraid of those who can destroy the body, but to fear the one who could destroy both the soul and body in hell. (Matthew 10:28)

As believers, we are not afraid God will destroy us, for he will keep his promise of eternal life to us. But we know we are exempt from judgment because of his mercy and grace, and we honor him for that. We would not dishonor him in fear of men.

Additionally, we are to see persecution as an opportunity to witness. We are always ready to explain our hope of eternity because Jesus saved us. (15) This is a part of honoring him. Paul’s proclamation of the gospel to the governors and kings who put him on trial are an example of this.

We also honor him in the way we do it, in gentleness and respect. And, if we keep a good conscience, those who revile our good behavior are put to shame. They may disagree with our theology, but they should have to admit that we are good people who do good deeds.

Although most of our institutions in America have lost their original identities, they were once testimonies to the culture of the good deeds of Christians. Christians founded colleges, built hospitals, and funded orphanages. Even non-believers had to acknowledge these good works.

Peter makes it clear that all suffering is not equal. Suffering for righteousness sake brings blessing. Suffering for doing evil is justice.


Christ Our Model
3:18-22

Peter again shows that Christ is our model. He also suffered. And he suffered for righteousness. He suffered for our sins even though he was righteous, that he could bring us to God. (18) This is substitutionary atonement. Jesus died for our sins.

Jesus’ death was not a defeat, because he was resurrected. We will follow him to the same destiny. Jesus was raised from the grave and ascended to heaven. Heaven is also our destiny after physical death, so we do not need to fear it. The troubles of this life are temporary because Christ has triumphed.

Now for the difficult part. Even Martin Luther said he could not be sure what Peter meant here.

Peter said Christ was put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit. (18) The ESV does not capitalize the word “spirit”, interpreting the verse as meaning Christ’s spirit lived although his body was killed.

The NIV, KJV and CSB say Jesus was made alive by the Spirit, capitalizing the word “Spirit”, meaning the Holy Spirit raised Christ from the dead.

I believe the NIV is correct here. The contrast is between Jesus’ death and his resurrection. It is not about some interim period between death and resurrection. The resurrection is where the victory is. And, Jesus was raised bodily, not just in the spirit. The Holy Spirit was the agent of the Christ’s resurrection. His spirit, like ours, would continue alive after death of the body regardless of the work of the Holy Spirit. It is that Christ’s body that must be “made alive”, just as ours will be made alive at the Resurrection.

This is why it is a path for us to look to. Paul made this same statement in 1 Corinthians 15:45-49 when he contrasted our “natural” bodied with our “spiritual” bodies. Natural bodies are the bodies we live in now. Spiritual bodies are those we have after the Resurrection.

We may be persecuted, tortured, or even killed in the body. But we will be raised with a new, glorified body for eternity, as Jesus was.

There is a similar thought in 1 Timothy 3:16. It says Jesus was “manifested in the flesh”. He took on human flesh at his incarnation, his birth as a human being. And, he was vindicated by the Spirit (and the ESV capitalizes here). How was he vindicated? He was resurrected (“taken up to glory”).

Peter then says that Christ, in the Holy Spirit, went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison. (19) They were in prison because they did not obey in the days before the flood. So, the question is, who are these spirits in prison? There are several views.

Here is the one I think is best. The spirits in prison are fallen angels. The word “spirits” in the New Testament refers to angelic beings in almost all cases. (Matthew 8:16; Luke 10:20; Acts 19:12; Hebrews 1:14)

The “time of Noah” seems to refer another difficult passage, Genesis 6:1-4, which describes corrupt behavior of the sons of God with the daughters of men. The Hebrew word translated “Nephilim” literally means “fallen ones”. This interpretation of Genesis 6 was the standard interpretation in Peter’s day.

We see a similar thought in Jude 6, which refers to angels who did not stay within their own position of authority, but left their proper dwelling. These angels God kept in eternal chains (bound) in gloomy darkness (prison) until the the day of judgment. Jude also compared them to the residents of Sodom who “likewise” indulged in sexual immorality. And, finally, Revelation 20:7 speaks of Satan being released from his prison after the thousand years are ended. The word “prison” is never used as a place where human beings reside after death.

Peter himself used this terminology in 2 Peter 2:4 when he wrote “For if God did not spare angels when they sinned, but cast them into hell and committed them to chains of gloomy darkness to be kept until the judgment…”

So, the resurrected Christ proclaimed his victory over Satan and his fallen angels. We see this proclamation of victory in verse 22, which says Jesus Christ is the one who has gone into heaven and is at the right hand of God, with angels, authorities, and powers having been subjected to him.

Knowing Christ’s victory over persecution and death gives us the strength and hope to face persecution. 

The death of Charles Spurgeon. Michael Reeves reflects.

TRAITS OF THE BELIEVER - 1 PETER 3:8-12

Traits of the Believer
3:8-12

Peter wraps up the section of the epistle that deals with living in relationships or institutions: citizen to government, slave to master, wife to husband, and husband to wife. That is why he used the word “finally”. (8) He has emphasized living in submission for the sake of Jesus, empowered by the freedom we have in him.

Verses eight and nine summarize what he has been saying. He gives five characteristics of the life we should live:

unity of mind
sympathy
brotherly love
a tender heart\compassion and
a humility.

It sounds simple when it is a list, doesn’t it? But let’s look at these traits Peter says we should have.

“Unity of mind” or “like-mindedness”. Believers should be unified in a mind that sets its hope on the return of Christ. (1:13) It is a hope based on eternity that gives the ability to look past the present problems to the glory that will later appear. It is a mind that cares more for the well being and sanctification others than for personal pride and privilege.

Paul gave a similar instruction to the Philippian church: “complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind”. (Philippians 2:2) He went on to say this mind is ours in Christ Jesus. (Php. 2:5) The Holy Spirit will unite our minds in pursuit of Christ if we do not let our selfishness get in the way. “Unity of mind” reveals the mind and love of Christ. It shows we pursue Christ, love him, and love his people.

Christian life is also marked by sympathy. Sympathy is rejoicing with those who rejoice and mourning with those who mourn. (Romans 12:15) Again, this models a trait of Jesus. He is the high priest who sympathizes with our weaknesses. (Hebrews 4:15)

Brotherly love, or love for one another (CSB) is the love we have because we are brothers and sisters in Christ. He loved, and loves us, so we must love each other, our fellow believers. We love them regardless of gender, or color, or race, because we who were not a people are now a people, the people of Christ. (2:9)

The bond in Christ transcends the bonds we have based on anything else. Paul put it this way: “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28)

Compassion is to have a tender heart for each other. Paul said to be compassionate to each other, forgiving each other, as God forgave you in Christ. (Ephesians 4:2) Jesus had compassion for the crowds and for the sick. The parable of the Good Samaritan teaches us to have compassion on all who need it. (Luke 10:33) We received compassion, so we have compassion for others, demonstrating Christ’s compassion to them.

Compassion is often the opposite of judgmental. It does not mean we ignore sin. But, it acknowledges that we all have weaknesses. It acknowledges that some are suffering for various reasons, but still suffering. And we can feel for them and help them.

The last trait is humility. We have looked at this trait before. It is modeled on Jesus, who was gentle and humble. It may be mocked in society, but is honored by God. Humility is not exalting yourself. It is putting others before yourself, not feeling entitled or prideful. Nietzsche mocked it as “slave mentality”. It is definitely “servant mentality”, based on the Christ’s humility that resulted in our salvation.

Putting these traits into action, we do not repay evil for evil. We do not revile those who revile us. (Revile mean to criticize and insult.) Instead, we bless those who revile us. (9) Again, our example is Jesus, who was reviled by the Jews and the Romans, yet did not revile them or act out evil against them.

We bless them by praying for their good and for their salvation. Stephen even prayed for God to forgive those who stoned him. (Acts 7:60)

This is difficult. Only the believer committed to Jesus and living in the power of the Holy Spirit can do it. It is against our human nature to do so. But the transformed believer can do it. As Jesus trusted his fate to the Father, we can trust that the Father will vindicate us and bring justice, if not in this life, then at the judgment. We can leave that to him and bless those who curse us.

If we do this, bless rather than revile, we will obtain a blessing. (9) Peter quoted Psalm 34: 12-16 as the source of his teaching. The Lord promised that his eyes would be on us for our protection and our prayers would be heard. We will love life and see good days. I love it when there is a reward involved, don’t you? Your reward is the favor and fellowship of the Lord.

I have this picture in my mind of Jesus returning to heaven after the resurrection. He had completed the mission the Father gave to him. He returned as Lord and King. The angels and creatures in heaven bowed before him. As he approached the throne, all of the love and favor of the Father poured forth upon him as he took his seat on the throne.

We receive favor from the Lord as we live for him on earth. But we also receive reward in heaven. Imagine having lived this life in love and humility, then being welcomed into heaven by Jesus who smiles upon you in love and favor and tells you that you have done well and to now enter into your reward.

Keep that picture in mind as you live your daily life trying to live out these traits that Peter lists.

BE SUBJECT TO - HUSBANDS: 1 PETER 3:1-7

Be Subject To - Husbands

3:1-7

The third institution Peter mentions is marriage. As with the other two institutions, Peter begins with “be subject to”. (1) (Many versions say “submissive”, but the Greek word is the same as that translated “be subject to”.) He instructed wives to be subject to their husbands.

Peter said to to do this “in the same way” or “likewise”, meaning in the same way Christians submit to the authority of government or slaves submit to their masters. Christians can do this because they know who they are in Christ and can submit themselves to others freely knowing it does not diminish who they are. If Jesus, who is Lord, could submit himself to the disciples by washing their feet, and submit himself to the Roman authorities to die on the cross, we can submit ourselves to bring honor to Jesus. Women can submit to the authority of their husbands because they know who they are in Christ.  

He said for wives to be subject to their husbands even if the husbands are not living in obedience to God’s word. The reason is that they may be won to Christ by witnessing the conduct of their wives. Even if they do not believe the gospel when they first hear it, they may come to believe it as they witness the good character of their wives. 

He also advised making their gentle and quiet spirit their main adornment rather than their clothing and accessories. That is not to say women cannot makes themselves look pretty. But that the thing that will witness to Christ is character not physical appearance.    

Jesus described himself as gentle and humble. (Matthew 11:29) Gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit. (Galatians 5:22) Paul urged all believers to aspire to live quietly. (1 Thessalonians 4:11) It is a spiritual trait all believers should strive for. Here, Peter says it is part of submitting yourself to another.  

There is a cultural element here. As people came to Christ, they had to figure out to deal with their Christian freedom in the context of their daily lives. At that time, most societies were patriarchal. A woman who realized her freedom in Christ, married to an unbeliever, might feel free to disrespect him. But, that would not make her look good, nor would it make her religion look good. 

But the same basic principle applies today. If a married woman becomes a Christian, is she more likely to lead her husband to Christ if she is nice to him and respectful to him, or if she constantly argues with him and disrespects him? 

A warning is needed here, however. Peter does not say a woman must submit herself to all men or all husbands, only her husband. Additionally, Peter does not give a right of enforcement to husbands, Husbands receive the submission of their wives, but do not have a right to physically or verbally abuse their wives to obtain submission.  

Peter also had an instruction for husbands. He does not use the phrase “be subject to”, wanting to maintain the Scriptural structure of marriage, but sets a high standard of behavior. He said to live with your wives in an understanding way. (7)

Men need to understand that women think and feel differently than they do. Men usually love that when they are dating. They love a woman’s tender heart, her affection, her emotional makeup. But, sometimes, after marriage, men find those things annoying and lash out at their wives. Peter said, live in an understanding way. Understand she is different. Enjoy that. Realize that her differences can help you. God made woman to be a helper to man. That implies that he needs help. I know I do. 

For example, my wife can ascertain if someone is troubled within seconds of meeting them. She can get people to tell them their troubles and comfort them. She has taught me to do this much better than I ever did on my own. 

Peter also said to show honor to the woman as the weaker vessel. There was a time when men held the door for a woman, carried her packages, and did the more physical things. It was not because men did not believe women could do those things. It was to honor them. 

The most important thing to remember is that women, wives, are equal to men, husbands before God, both heirs of grace. (7) Both are made in the image of God. (Genesis 1:27) 

Failure to honor your wife in this way will even hinder your prayers. 

Christian life is not lived by demanding our rights, but by giving them up for the sake of Christ. It is important that spouses remember that their marriage is not just for their fulfillment, but to glorify Christ in the world.