BANKER'S HOURS. So, a guy in Lynchberg Virginia decides to rob a bank. He grabs his pellet gun and goes to the bank. Problem. The bank is closed for lunch. He can't get in. So, he bangs on the door. The tellers call the cops. He gets arrested. Planning is everything.

You have to wonder about the guys thought processes (if there were any). I mean how do you get from home in the recliner to trying to rob a bank with a pellet gun. Well, officer, I was sittin; in the Lazy Boy havin' an early beer, just trying to keep the edge off you know, watching Dukes of Hazzard, and I thought to myself, self, I could knock off a bank. So, I grabbed a pellet gun and headed out. Who knew they'd be closed?

Most banks, of course, have armed guards. Like with real guns and ammo. So, he got off pretty lucky. If this had happened in West Texas, he'd a pulled out the gun, and 16 customers woulda opened fire with Smith and Wessons.

But, really, do you want to commit a crime in a town called Lynchberg?